I’ve Got Your Russia/Ukraine Peace Plan Right Here
1. Russia gets the f*ck out of Ukraine
2. Russia pays for all the f*cking damage it caused
3. Russia shuts the f*ck up and sits the f*ck down.
Now gimme my f*cking Nobel Peace Prize.
And now, our feature presentation...
Cheers and Jeers for Monday, November 24, 2025
Note: This morning I cooked up four strips of turkey bacon for breakfast. It would've been six but I pardoned two of them.
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By the Numbers:
10 days!!!
Days 'til the first night of Hanukkah: 20
Days 'til the Scents and Sweets Contest and Auction in Frederick, Maryland: 10
Trump's net approval average among all polling of independents last January: -4 pts.
Trump's net approval among independents now: -43 pts.
Years since the employment picture has been as weak as 2025: 15
Percent of the U.S. population that was over age 65 in 2004 and 2024, respectively: 12%, 18%
Percent of Americans who say they try to avoid politics at the Thanksgiving dinner table: 71%
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Mind if I interrupt…?
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CHEERS to short workweeks. Only three days for most Americans this week—hopefully you're among them. Then it's turkey, gravy, spuds and a whole lotta nothin' else. Except, of course, our usual 14 hours of daily blogging. ("Pass the stuffing, dear. And the screen shammy...")
CHEERS to comings and goings. Holy freedom fries, Batman! Nobody could've predicted what happened on Friday, November 21…a date which will live in both famy and infamy. In no particular order: Democratic-socialist New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani came to visit U.S. President and piggy-who-should-be-quiet Donald Trump in the Oval Office, where both agreed that the former was a promising rising star (and definitely not a jihadist) who will do great things for the Big Apple, while the latter is a fascist rotting faster than a hot dog rotating on the Carousel of Woe at 7-11.
But what happened next will SHOCK you! Georgia Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor-Greene, who was first to warn the world about Jewish space lasers and the Gazpacho Police, announced she's throwing her dumbbells in a cardboard box and leaving the chamber in January, but not before setting her TRUMP 2028 merch ablaze in the parking lot. Why? Because she wants to be the next Peach Queen, and she’ll stop at nothing to clear a path to the crown.
But what happened before that will PRE-SHOCK you! Speaking of goings, Trump's approval rating is, as the toilet so proudly said, "in me!" And with his delusions of dictatorship still being acted out on the national stage, the peasantry that makes this country run is preparing to flush his party's majority out of Congress in 2026.
Join Rachel Maddow tonight when she'll recap the above stories and utter the immortal words: "WTF, people? I mean, W T actual F?"
CHEERS to The Jair Bolsonaro Show. He's haughty…and naughty…his ethics are all spotty...and now his reputation's swirling down the potty. It's The Jair Bolsonaro Show—in color! Today's episode: "What Have You Done Now, Jair?"
Jair Bolsonaro sitting in living room easy chair: Ahhhh, a nice relaxing morning in my chair. I think I'll open the newspaper and see what's happening in the world. What's this? "Brazil’s former president Jair Bolsonaro was under arrest on Saturday over suspicion he was plotting to avoid starting a 27-year prison sentence for leading a coup attempt"? But I haven't been arrest…..
[Knock Knock!]
Voice on other side of door: Mr. Bolsonaro! Open up! It's the police! You're under arrest for plotting to skip town before you begin your prison sentence!
Bolsonaro: Ay yai yai! Can’t a despot get a little peace and quiet around here?!!
[Cue laugh track]
[Cue flashing applause sign]
[Cut to credits]
He's haughty…and naughty…his ethics are all spotty...and now his reputation's swirling down the potty. It's The Jair Bolsonaro Show—in color!
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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CHEERS to "Old Rough 'n Ready." Happy birthday to "#12" Zachary Taylor, who became president in 1849. Odd fellow:
Taylor was one strange-looking dude. Given his thick trunk, long, spindly arms, and a face like shoe leather, he bore an unsettling resemblance to an orangutan.
General Bedhead
Old Rough and Ready may have been at home in the saddle, but he needed help getting into it—his legs were too short and bow-shaped to do it alone.
His hat of choice was a broad-rimmed, floppy thing woven of palmetto leaves, which—along with a mismatched set of rags that he frequently passed off as clothes—led some people to mistake their president for a farmer.
—From Secret Lives of the U.S. Presidents by Cormac O'Brien
He ruled the national roost for a whopping 1 year and 126 days until he became "Old Gastroenteritis" and died from some combination of a) tainted water, b) tainted cherries, or c) tainted iced milk. You know the drill...pay your respects and then move along. Taint nice to stare at dead folks.
CHEERS to order in the courts. Before holiday fever consumes all the judges and they take off for vacation (I can’t wait to hear what opulence Harlan Crow has in store for Clarence Thomas), let's take a quick spin around the Judicialverse and note a few rulings that have tongues a' wagging:
Freedom from forced Jesus The Supreme Court on Monday declined to take up a legal fight involving a Christian school that wanted to broadcast a pregame prayer over the stadium loudspeaker before a championship football game, turning away a major religious liberty dispute on the heels of a 2022 decision involving prayer in schools. In rejecting the appeal, the high court will not reconsider a 25-year-old decision that found student-led and initiated prayer at football games unconstitutional. There were no noted dissents.
Busy times for these hammer-like devices.
Trump’s war on America, Part I: A federal judge ordered the Trump administration to end its monthslong deployment of National Guard troops to help police the nation’s capital. “Normalizing the use of military troops for domestic law enforcement sets a dangerous precedent, where the President can disregard states’ independence and deploy troops wherever and whenever he wants—with no check on his military power,” [D.C. Attorney General Brian] Schwalb said.
Trump’s war on America, Part II: A federal judge issued an extraordinary rebuke of the Department of Homeland Security's immigration enforcement operation in Chicago, saying the administration made "widespread misrepresentations" as to what was occurring during the operation. … Ellis said that Border Patrol commander-at-large Greg Bovino lied about the events that transpired in the Little Village area of Chicago in October.
Judge Judy: The plaintiff was awarded $250 after the defendant botched the installation of a new garage door opener, then ran off with the plaintiff's wife in a car without insurance, got in a fender-bender, but still managed to drive home and trim the neighbor’s overhanging branches way past the property line.
And with that, we're adjourned.
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Ten years ago in C&J: November 24, 2015
CHEERS to the demolition derby in Dixie. If you were in a self-imposed media blackout over the weekend, here's the big story from Saturday night's special election in Louisiana: Democrat John Bel Edwards swatted down Republican David Vitter like a pesky gnat wearing a diaper and will become the state's first governor with a "D" after his name in a dozen years. Don’t get your hopes up that there's a liberal revolution about to take hold there—Edwards is made of blue-dog stuff, but at least he has enough common sense to expand health insurance in the state via Medicaid. As for Vitter, whose prostitution scandal finally caught up with him: he says he won't run for re-election in the Senate so he can spend more time with his family. Now begging him to reconsider: his family.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to the calm before the calm. After going through the alphabet with named storms up through M (Melissa), there are only 6 days 'til the end of Atlantic hurricane season for the U.S. Let's check in and see if NOAA thinks anyone should be building arks:
Nope—all clear, at last. Let’s just quietly tiptoe along and speak no more of it. And for God’s sake, someone tell everyone in the Caribbean to cancel their spinning classes for a week. That’s how these things start.
Have a tolerable Monday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
"Democrats will make giving Cheers and Jeers the Nobel Peace Prize a central midterm issue. It’ll be impossible for Republicans to ignore and unlikely they’ll win over most voters to their side."
—Karl Rove
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